February 26, 2009

• *IDOL36: WEEK 2*

  It's week 2 of the voting rounds, and the next 12 get their chance to make us love them.  This round is all about first impressions.  It's their first real chance to make or change our perceptions of them -- perceptions based on tv editing and mere snippets of their singing.  This is why SONG CHOICE is so incredibly crucial at this stage.  The easiest way to make us believe who they are is to pick songs that don't shout IDENTITY CRISIS.  Unfortunately, just as with last week, identity crises abound this week. 

  JASMINE MURRAY
  A black girl singing a VERY white girl song.  Her "Love Song" was a travesty.  And it's a shame because she's a cute girl, with Brandy/Ashanti looks.  Should've sung Brandy's "Have You Ever," or even Beyonce "If I Were A Boy."

  MATT GIRAUD
  I cringed from beginning to end.  Singing "Viva La Vida"....a choice so crazy and suicidal, he may as well have chosen "Viva La Vida Loca."  His voice was weak and shrill.  Should've sung anything by Justin Timberlake, another weak and shrill voice, but loaded with style and soul.   

  JEANINE VAILES
  A black girl wanting to be a white guy group.  She looks like Destiny's Child but she sings Maroon 5?  Terrible!  Should've sang Beyonce "Irreplacable."  She has no chance.

  NICK MITCHELL
  Identity-crisis-on-wheels did his signature strong black woman song, although....I think he could've done something interesting with "Viva La Vida."  VotefortheWorst.com is salivating over Nick making the top 12.  I'd say there's no chance in hell of that happening.  Yes, we know underneath that freak show is an actual good voice.  But at this point, enough already.   

  ALLISON IRAHETA
  My ears always perk up when I hear "Alone."  Her performance turned into like a crazy tiger attack -- all that thrashing around and red hair like blood splatter.  But that's a good thing...because it wasn't boring!  It was exhilirating to see a new Kelly Clarkson emerging.  Her powerful voice excites me.  The top 12 would suck without her.

  KRIS ALLEN
  Cute white guy thinking he's a black guy from the 80's (who later became a white girl-guy and then a ghoul with no nose).  This is honestly the first time I recall seeing him sing.  He's quite good.  He looks like a cross between John Stamos and Enrique Iglesias.  I would've chosen for him to sing Enrique's "Escape" (a song, btw, which Kara DioGuardi wrote!  No joke).

  MEGAN CORKREY
  Her scary puppet bodily movements (and full arm tattoos) made me cringe.  I hated the song choice.  I think "Put Your Records On" is such a weak ass jump-roping song, but she did more with it than I could ever expect.  Her voice is unique and confident, and I'm intrigued.  I'm having trouble picking an ideal song for her, but that's kinda good because I can't quite figure her out yet.

  MATT BREITZKE
  His Tonic song "If You Could Only See" is not a song fans can rally around, no matter how well he sung it.  He should've sung something more soulful and Motown like "Stand By Me" or "My Girl."  I hated his attitude while being judged.  He seems like an angry person. 

  JESSE LANGSETH
  I was excited by her choice of "Bette Davis Eyes," but not so by her execution.  Gwyneth Paltrow actually did a much better job karaoke'ing this in "Duets."  And her face makes me uncomfortable because frankly, she reminds me of that poor deformed creature in the 80's Cher movie "Mask." 

  KAI KALAMA
  Safe, boring, forgettable.  Unfortunately I can't forget how terrible his hair is.  I'd respect him more had he done a complete image makeover -- short hair, shaved face, teeth whitening -- and gone the Jason Castro route with something islandy or reggae.  His song was tired and uninspired, and I'm not even wasting my energy coming up with a hypothetical perfect song for him.  He's so done.

  MISHAVONNA HENSON
  White girl trying to be a guy band.  "Drops of Jupiter"...wtf?!  That song takes 5 minutes to rev up and achieve some semblance of recognizability, and all they get is 90 seconds.  For her, I would've chosen Katy Perry.  She could've benefited from some "Hot N Cold." 

  ADAM LAMBERT    
  I love this guy, from the moment he auditioned to his Cher "Believe" in Hollywood.  Didn't love the song he chose now, but he's such a seasoned pro with such exciting rock star looks and rock star poise and confidence.  I would've loved loved loved to hear him sing one of my favorite punk rocker songs:  Billy Idol "Eyes Without a Face."  I can already see my dream match-up for the Idol finale in May:  Adam Lambert VS. Danny Gokey.

  SO WHO'S IS MAKING IT TO TOP 12?  
  Adam Lambert, Allison Iraheta, Megan Corkrey.  There, I said it. 

  • 1:23 am
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