January 29, 2008

• *D-LIST EVENING*

  Saturday nite, cousin Jennifer and I had a most exciting evening ahead, for which we needed proper fuel.  So we first met up at our new favorite spot, THE SMITH (3rd & 10th....or see the previous entry, lazy frocks) for a well balanced 3-course dinner.

   

  Lunch at The Smith a few weeks ago was breezy and casual.  Dinner is a different story -- classy and candlelit, lively and sophisticated.  And that's just what Furfur and I were....two sophicates out on the town, adding beauty to the fug clientele.

   

  And the beauty on our plates:  Salmon tartare with avocado creme fraiche.  I'm no fan of raw fish cuisine, but I can do tartare because it's yumyumme.  FurFur's ginormous grilled pork chop.  This was a monsterly delicious pork chop, laden with caramelized onions.

   

  I had the pan-fried Skate wish, which I just love.  It had roasted cauliflower and a caper butter sauce.  Afterwards, a light dessert of "Bread Pudding"...2 scoops of chocolate chip ice cream, caramelized bananas, walnuts, bread and whipped cream.  This was died-and-gone-to-heaven delicious! 

  Right after dinner, we skedaddled on over to Madison Square Garden for the night's main event: 

  (in announcer voice)  The HILARIOUS  KAAATHY GRIFFFIIIIIIN!!!

  

  I know I know....most of you just rolled your squinty judgmental eyes and groaned "ugh...I hate this woman", to
  which I just rolled my squinty judgmental eyes and hissed "I hate you all."  I know I've lost most of you by this point.  But those of you with an open mind for comedy and/or
  everlasting adoration of me -- you prudish fuckers owe it to me to hear me out
  on this.  Kathy Griffin is....not Nicole Kidman.  Nor does she want to
  be at this point in her career.  Instead, she has ingeniously crafted a glorious career of making
  fun of the Kidmans.  Well, not her per se, but more hilariously, Brit &
  Paris (not places in Europe), Barbara Walters, Barbra Streisand, the Osmonds, Dr.
  Phil, Ryanna Shecrest, Paula Abdul, Clay Gaiken, Sharon Stone, Jesus and the Catholics, and Oprah!  Jesus and the Catholics had it coming.... but Oprah?!  I
  mean, who dares mock the Big O??  Kathy not only tells it like it is, but she
  tells it like she's seen it, and she tells it like we suspected all along about these stupid smug celebs.  We
  suspect that Ryan Seacrest and Barbara Walters are cunts and
  douchebags, respectively.  And like a strong black woman, Kathy ain't afraid to say it.  Her D-List persona is
  perfect for ripping apart these A-listers thru her awkward encounters, down-to-earth intuition,
  and catty confrontations, and by telling everybody they can suck it.   She is divinity to the gays and girls
  who adore her, and she talks about stuff we all know about, so her stories are not hard to follow.  I nod till my head hurts and slap my leg to near-paralysis, agreeing with everything she says because I have all those same thoughts, and you do too!

  

  Having said all that, Furfur and I are the biggest Kathy Griffin fans I know, and we wouldn't have it any other way.  Seeing her live at the theater at MSG, nestled amongst a safe pillow of her most rabid laughing gays and girls, was a dream come true!  Kathy has replaced Mariah as the celeb I'd most like to sit at dinner with.  She performed nearly 2 hours of new material, each bit of it pure sacrilegious gold.  She is our comedy Jesus, she is going straight to hell, and we're hot on her heels, cackling ungracefully.

  Now take a few minutes and watch her latest Bravo comedy special  "KATHY GRIFFIN:  Straight to Hell"

  Watch the rest Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5.  Tell me Kathy Griffin isn't absolutely  D-Listcious!

  • 10:22 pm
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